Part II- The Fall

For a pecan, the fall represents their next phase in their life cycle. They fall from the tree because they no longer need all of the support it has been given, although when it falls, you will notice that it doesn't fall very far from the tree.

(Baby Ashley... Blonde hair and a big ol' belly)

In life, the fall is the beginning of living our life on our own. Not that we no longer need the love and support from our families but we have received all we can from them up to that point and the rest is up to us. We too don't fall far from the tree.

I stayed close to home for some of my own reasons and for many unknown reasons. I was scared of the fall. I loved the comfort of my mom, David, and Dee being so close. They had been my main line of support for the past 18 years, along with my friends, and I just wasn't ready to leave them yet.

 

College was my first initial move from the my "comfort zone" or roots. I had always had the same group of friends and we experienced many triumphs and tragedies together. It was hard to put myself out there and make new friends. In comparison with the pecan, when some of them fall, they are the beautiful pecans that we crack and eat, while others still have a thick, dark shell, providing them a little more time to develop and ripen before they are picked. I was a late developer, a hider. I, like a lot of you, have been through and experienced loss, first when loosing my dad, and then later one of my best friends since before I can remember. I truly felt like I lost who I was but then later found a better, more positive, caring, loving person than before. I cherished things just a little bit more and loved life more than possible. I walked away with the knowledge that life is short, and we have to love hard and deep while we can. It goes by so quickly.

 

I learned more about myself that first year of college than I ever thought possible... Mostly through the late night conversations with my sisters or mom and dee. As each day passes, the pecan continues to adjust to life off of the tree, either by being picked or by slowly loosing that protective extra shell. As college continued, so did my growth as a person. I met some great friends, made a lot of memories, and slowly became more of myself again. Although I'm still not sure why exactly I stayed in town, because of that choice, my life forever changed by the people that I met, both through my sorority and the education department. If I hadn't made that choice, I wouldn't be where I am today, teaching my little friends who forever changed my life, have the friends I have, or be married to my wonderful husband who I couldn't imagine life without. Life has a funny way of working out that way. But that will all come later in "THE PICK".

 

 

Which leads me to my favorite part...THE PICK and my life today as I know it.  Ill be back to tell you all about it tomorrow but here is a quote to leave you with. It is one that I love to live by.

 

Most people can look back over the years and identify a time and place at which their lives changed significantly. Whether by accident or design, these are the moments when, because of a readiness within us and a collaboration with events occurring around us, we are forced to seriously reappraise ourselves and the conditions under which we live and to make certain choices that will affect the rest of our lives.
- Frederick F. Flack

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Words to Think About

I was doing a paper for my Masters program a few months back and sent some questions for my grandparents to answer. They answered them the way that I knew they would and I just had to share their answers with you all today. The thoughts that they shared and the things that they said about life and our jobs still repeat over in my head on the days when I just need a little reminder.

(Meet Granddad and Grandmom... they are too of the most precious, giving, caring souls that I am lucky to call my grandparents)

Grandmom first:

1. Work is not always what you get from it, but what you become by it. Find something you love to do and do it well enough so that someone will pay you to do it. Work should fill your heart and mind with passion and your spirit with hope.

2. Money is necessary in our lives but should not be allowed to rule the type of individuals we become or become the most important thing in our lives.

3. Success is learning to make daily contributions to our betterment, actualization of long-term goals, knowing that we can trust our feelings and follow our hearts and the sure knowledge that we did the best we were capable of doing.

4. to be a good person one must make ethical decisions, help in creating community and become genuinely interested in the betterment of the world you live in.

5. My advice to you about work is choose wisely. When all is said and done, you are most likely to spend at least half your waking life on your profession or vocation. What a tragedy it would be if you had to spend so much time on something that meant so little to you.


Granddad says:

1. Work is important in our pursuit of happiness in this life. Our training to do a specific job keeps us motivated. We develop friendships in our personal lives at work and we contribute to the well being of the world.

2. Money is essential in life in order that we can provide basic necessities such as food, clothing, education and comforts in our lives. It can be considered a reward for work well done, Money does not guarantee happiness.

3. Success is realizing the fulfillment of goals in our lives, providing happiness in the lives of those we love, peace of mind, and knowing that we did the best that we could in whatever venture we tackle.

4. To be a good person one must put others first, realize the value of each person, be real and authentic, reach out to other people and practice being good and loveable.

5. My advice to you about work is to, love to learn new things, be open to constructive feedback, be self-initiating and be motivated and work hard.

To them, this is their every day way of living life with one another. They are true examples of working hard to provide for their family, doing great things for their family, and just showing love through the way that they live life. They are an amazing example for me and I just love them both to pieces.

P.S- I know some of you are waiting for Part II of the Pecan blog... it's coming. I had written this early this morning and just felt like sharing it today in case any of my friends needed a reminder also.

The Rise and Fall (Literally) of the Pecan

Maybe a little weird but here goes.

Michael and I were out picking pecans and I was just thinking about life and love in general...I mean that's normal thinking for a Monday right?!... Anyways, a thought crossed my mind about how funny it was how alike the pecans are to our lives that we live. We are born thanks to our amazing parents (God Bless them), we grow up under their rules, their expectations, their guidance, and their influence. Then, when we are good and ripe, we fall from our little family trees in the hopes of pursing something amazing. Then someone comes along and picks us and thus our new life begins. That's the shorter version than the 30 minute thinking process I had while Michael and I were out picking pecans in the backyard.

I consider myself very lucky to have grown up the way that I did. I had 2 amazing parents who never told me "no" when I wanted to try something new, never missed a single sporting event, unless Dee or David were playing at the same time, although they usually made it at some point, supported my good and bad decisions, and ultimately loved me more than they seemed to love themselves. They did without so that I could live WITH. They took us on trips and I have memories to last me a lifetime from the short 15 years I had with my dad. (That's a whole different blog post). My mom made sure that we all knew she was still there after we lost dad and continued the life her and dad had given us the best that she could as a working, single mother of 3 children. I believe that the childhood they gave me is what holds me back from wanting to join my friends in motherhood just yet because I want to be able to provide for my children and do the things that my parents did with Dee, Dave, and I throughout our childhood. My time will come, and I hope to be half the mom that my mom was to me, Michael's mom was to him, or a mom like my amazing friends already are for their beautiful children but for now I have lots to work on (especially considering I am writing a post about pecans).

My childhood through high school years were amazing, even in dealing with the loss of my dad. In comparison with the pecan, these were my developing years. Making me who I was through love, support, and nourishment and beginning to shape me into the person that I am today. As the pecan gets bigger and more ripe, it gets closer to the fall that ultimately begins the rest of it's life.

The fall...
To be continued tomorrow. Sorry friends. My mind is full of distractions today so my thoughts just keep getting jumbled. Tune in tomorrow for the completion of these thoughts.

EXTRA: I saw this on Pinterest and had to share. Seems just about perfect to sum up my thoughts in  a better way than comparing myself to a pecan.

 

Capturing Happiness

Last night, Michael and I were sitting on the back porch (we're soaking in this homeowner thing) and just talking. Hobbies were our main point of discussion which is why today, I have been researching cameras.

Michael is an avid fisher. We own a bay boat and he goes as often as he can. He has more reels than he does fingers and I've even gotten down some of the lingo... "Oh you need a popping cork" or "wait...chartreuse is on the top of the hook?" But the best part is that he has a hobby. When he leaves work, or has a day off, he loves being out on the water. It's his peaceful place and stress relief from a job that can consume his life.

So what about me. I love pretty much everything... Love being outside, reading books, working in my classroom, drinking Dr. Pepper...but when I think about a hobby only one thing comes to mind. I love taking pictures. I think I practically made Sue buy me one of THE first digital cameras and used the heck out of that thing. It was silver when we bought it and later turned to a dark gray because of all the scratches from me using it all day every day. I have thousands (not being dramatic) of pictures from my senior year. I documented everything. If you asked my ZTA girls, they would tell you I was obsessed with taking pictures of everything we did. As I was cleaning out my pictures from my old computer, I had ridiculous amounts of pictures of everything we did. I'm so thankful for that today because all of the memories I have can be reminisced by looking at my pictures.

But more than that, I just loved taking pictures. I love capturing people when they are happy, documenting the good times so that in the midst of the bad, we could reminisce over the amazing times we've had, and it brought me joy to just take pictures. I don't think of myself as someone who would be a photographer... I'm not creative, I see things but a photographer has an eye for the beauty every where. I just love being able to capture happiness. Probably because I love the feeling of happy.

I got away from my love of taking pictures after college. When you leave college, other things overtake your life. I take pictures every day of my kiddos but can't share them publicly because of safety and privacy. I have amazing friends but when were together its more of a stress relief time than "hey let's take pictures together". My husband is not a picture taker. Ask our sweet photographer Shay. We just about pulled teeth taking engagement pictures although he did do a good job in the end. Just not a fan.

(copyright of Shalyn Nelson Photography.... Visit Shay's Blog)


But there are still opportunities... I love going hunting with Michael and his dad because I can just watch them, snap pictures, and capture their hunt through my camera lens.

So back to the story now that you have more background info than you need. If something is your hobby, shouldn't you be actively participating in that hobby when possible... Well I haven't been. I have a great canon camera that easily fits in my pocket but my heart has always desired to own a Canon EOS camera. So Michael, being the amazing person he is says "just go get it." So research time it is... I've got lots of choices and lots of help in choosing. My heart is so excited and happy that I sat down, figured it out, and it's go time. I feel a sense of relief and excitement that I will get to learn all about it and that I have something to look forward to. I've been a little worried as I finish grad school in 3 weeks. I love being busy with something and when it's over, I worry that I would go crazy and be bored. Now I have so many plans for lots of photographing and maybe some new classes. :)

Ill keep you all updated. Thanks for reading and happy, happy Saturday sweet friends.

Right Where I Need To Be

As I'm sitting outside with Michael, feeling the amazing, cool breeze, my feet propped up, makeup and Gwen stefani hair do still in tact (as my sweet husband calls it) I am feeling more and more blessed and thankful to be where I am at this very moment.

(don't pay any attention to the chipped toes, white legs, or the dirty IPad screen please)

I had a great day with my little friends, had 81% parent participation at a meeting, and got great feedback from the meeting from those awesome parents. Now that makes for a good day.

I found a quote once that says:

"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I am positive I have ended up where I needed to be."

Now that my sweet friends, is one of the most true sayings that I have ever heard. In the midst of things, we don't always see what the plan is for us; why we ended up in a particular place, with a certain person, but as we look back it all makes sense in it's own way. The way that I ended up here, in this beautiful house, sitting next to this wonderful man who is my best friend and my husband is still a mystery, but was obviously part of MY plan. I never thought that I would have left my home...yes I know that I am only 2 and a half hours away, but for a girl that never went away to camp, never left my parents longer than a few days, and didn't "go away" to college, this is a long way away. Especially with Dave still being in hs and my mom being one of my best friends (but those things are both stories of their own). But here I am, in a new town, in a house that we own...well not really but kinda... and a group of amazing friends that I practically consider family and I couldn't be happier or dreamed up a better life for myself. I know that things aren't perfect. I am always working towards particular goals, making myself a better person, wife, friend, sister, daughter, but my heart is happy and that matters most.

So today, after my amazing day with my kiddos, their parents, and ending the night sitting outside with beautiful weather and a great little family of my own, I am just.... happy. At peace. More than content. Happy.

P.S- How could I not be extra happy with life with this little munchkin to lay around with and love on. Her birthday is tomorrow so happy 2nd/14th Birthday to my

Tilly girl!!

Thank you for reading tonight's blog. As always, it's a work in progress. Your welcome to click that "follow" button on the left hand side or just visit whenever you would like. :) Happy Friday Eve my vivacious visitors.

They Are Our Future....

I wanted to take some time to write about the presidential debate happening right now....

NOT!

I know that everyone has their own views, hears what each candidate is saying differently, and on election day will vote a certain way based on what they believe and feel...not what I post on fb, twitter, or my new lovely blog...

 

HOWEVER....

 
As I was sitting there grading papers, listening to the back and forth on tv, I came across a students paper and automatically felt bad. We had a misunderstanding today, and without knowing, I upset her. I think it was more because I was upset with her for not making a smart choice than it was that I corrected her behavior. She came up to me apologizing with tears streaming down her face. Talk about feeling like the size of a pin needle......What kind of mean person makes a first grader cry? Well that was me today. And as the rain is pounding on my roof, I wish that I could take it back and tell her in a different way how her actions weren't a smart choice.
 
Through the hustle and bustle of the day, trying to fit in learning reading strategies, with learning place value, talking about families, and understanding that heat causes changes in objects.... I for a quick second lost touch with the fact that I am the teacher of 21 six and seven year olds. These students will grow up to be the doctors that take care of us, the teachers that teach our children and grandchildren, the vets that take care of our pets, and the actors, actresses, and singers that we watch and listen to. Every time that I see a child somewhere, it reminds me that they are our future. What we say to them, how we treat them, the experiences that they get are what shape them into the person that they will be.
 
If you have ever sat down next to a child and talked with them about anything, their views and ideas about things make you feel as if every little thing in our life will be ok because of the hope that they have. I believe that the reason I love my job so much is because on the days when I feel like I have not done my best, they make me feel like the most amazing person out there, whether with hugs, notes, or just a simple reminder of something that we learned.
 
Children have the innocence that I wish that we all could still have. Most of them don't understand the loss that some of us have felt, the disappointment that can overtake us on some days, the overwhelming feeling that everything is resting on their shoulders. I wish for each of you (and for myself) reading this blog that for just one day that we could view the world the way that a child does daily. I like to think that the world would be a very different place if we could have more of a positive attitude about it.
 
People talk about paying it forward. I challenge you, and I will do it to, to pay it forward tomorrow. Pay for the person's drink behind you at McDonald's, slip a note onto someones desk to let them know that you think they are wonderful....whatever your little hearts desire....make it happen. There is such a great feeling knowing that you may have changed that persons day, week, or even month. So little can do so much.
 
Leaving this one on a quote... I love quotes... I wish I could write them all over a wall in a room... (wonder if Michael would let me...)  

 

"There is a purpose in every existence. It's also the reason why we still wake up each day finding the missing puzzle piece to make life complete."

 

P.s- Sorry about my........fetish. I hate to end a sentence when my brain is still working to try and add on to it. I'm still working on this blogging thing. Bare with me....

OH....and you can comment and tell me how awful these are or just leave me some ideas for later topics. :)

 

HAPPY WEDNESDAY EVE!!!! 

Something That We Do

Michael picked a song for us to dance to at our wedding and it truly is the perfect song for a husband and wife, both new and old.

 

I remember wellthe day we wed, I can see that picture in my head.

I still believethe words we said, forever will ring true.
Love is certain, love is kind, love is yours and love is mine.

But it isn'tsomething that we find it's something that we do.

It's holding tight, lettin' go, it's flying highand laying low. Let your strongest feelings show, and your weakness, too. It'sa little and a lot to ask an endless and a welcome task.

Love isn'tsomething that we have it's something that we do.

We help to make each other all that we can be, thoughwe can find our strength and inspiration independently. The way we worktogether is what sets our love apart. So closely that we can't tell where I endand where you start.

It gives me heart remembering how we started with a simple vow.
There's so much to look back on now still it feels brand-new.
We're on a road that has no end and each day we begin again.
Love's not just something that we're in it'ssomething that we do.

We help to make each other all that we can be. Wecan find our strength and inspiration independently. The way we work togetheris what sets our love apart. So closely that we can't tell where I end andwhere you start.

Love is wide, love is long, love is deep and love is strong. Love is why I lovethis song and I hope you love it too. I remember well the day we wed, I can seethat picture in my head.

Love isn't justthose words we said it's something that we do.

There's no request too big or small we giveourselves we give our all.

Love isn'tsomeplace that we fall it's something that we do.

 

I was driving through McDonalds to get one of the 8 Dr. Peppers that I drank today....(Hi, my name is Ashley and I'm a Dr. Pepper addict). The lady at the first window had on this sweet, delicate wedding band that I couldn't help but notice. Now I don't know her story...she may have just gotten married last week or has been married for 30 years. I like to think it was the latter because I love forever love stories. I have no room to judge anyones situation, as I have been married for 4 incredible months now....but I just love love. I believe in the unity of marriage and what it stands for, mostly because my parents and grandparents set that example for me.

*******Speaking of, I was at their house the other day and they recently moved to Conroe from Huntsville. Well my sweet grandmom is missing her old house and all of the bookshelfs that she had that housed years and years and lots and lots of pictures.... (her new house doesn't have any shelving fo her). So my wonderful grandfather, trying to help in any way to make her happy hired someone to come in and build her new shelfs...they already look amazing and she was so happy showing them to me.... Love isn't just those words we say.... it's something that we DO.

 

Every time that I hear this song, it reminds me that there is so much more to loving your husband and wife that just falling in love, finding someone to love, saying those words, or being "in love"....it is always something that we DO. It's the little reminders like a kiss on the head, a dr pepper in the freezer, an extra alarm set, etc. One of the things the preacher said to Michael and I on our wedding day was that it isnt just about the gifts on certain holidays or saying the words, its the action of being there for one another, listening on the tough days, laughing at the good ones, and just enjoying life with eachother. (that man had alot of good advice....i'll post that later)

 

And all of this yapping just from a simple trip to Mickey D's for a Dr. Pepper.... you must really be excited you stopped by.

 

And yes....me and this guy are legally married....pretty scary right?

The Beginning

I'm not too sure what prompted me to get on my computer at 9:00 at night and start working on this blog, but it is now 11:26 pm and I am still trying to figure out what in the world I'm thinking. #1 because it's so late and I know that I won't be able to sleep until I understand every microscopic thing there is to know about this blogging world, how to make my page cute and fun like everyone elses, AND last but not least, why I think that I am interesting enough to even have a blog to begin with.

I once met a girl who later became my wonderful photographer for my wedding and she is ultimately...well duh amazing. I love her heart and the happieness that she brings out in pretty much anyone who knows her. Well she has a blog that I love reading it, so I figured I would try it out. I mean what could it hurt...

Fb has pretty much become a battle ground and I like to get online and share all of the amazing wonderful(and stressful) things that are going on in my life, crazy things my first graders have said, or just share a story... I figured for now, this can be my release place for all of that. I can't promise I'll always post the most fascinating things, that it will always be positive or uplifting, but well...i'll give it my best shot.

Come back and visit, or if not, have a great day.

(yikes...how bad am I at this so far.... I'll get better...pinky promise...at least I hope)

PS- Shay's blog is 10000x better.... go visit.....So Shay